Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Africa Has Famous People As Well!

twitter is a great network for music. it helps you get your music out, it helps you support your friends, it also helps you find new people to add to your blog :) i have discovered from using twitter, that africa has famous people as well. hope you enjoy their music as much as i do. if you do, please share, follow, and support them. ♥

JIMMY SOOT: i know him as uncle jimmy from twitter. he's a dj, producer, and even a photographer as well.

JOHNNY GREG: i know him from Shaton, they have a song together called Run Away. johnny also does Graphic Designs and Printing. p.s. i ♥ johnny's music. :D

SOOT MUZIKK: is a record label, jimmy is the founder and johnny is part of the team.

Friday, September 08, 2017


im starting to dislike people who just add me for just because... like a lot of people who add me, really dont have a reason for adding me. but i talk with the mutual friend, and based on what they say, is if i add the person or not... and lately.. the people who believe that everything has cures are the ones who are adding me.. and if you know me, i dont believe that everything has a cure. if everything had a cure, no one would die. people wouldnt be dying each day. rare diseases wouldnt be forming either. what i live with, ive been told many times im a rare case in calgary, let alone canada. what i have, there isnt a cure.

[i really hate when people think they have the best medicine for you to heal you. and it's like no. you cant heal me. either accept it or dont talk to me. and this dude apparently has fallin in love with me after an hour of talking to me because im hilarious. and im like no, you dont love me.
"No I just no you can be healed, for every apple there's an orange, don't feel sorry for yourself, when it's time whatever is wrong will be fixed." ummm no. life doesnt work like that. if everything wrong will be fixed, no one would be dead. and now he thinks he can make me feel better by saying "hey guess what, i love you." umm it doesnt work like that.]

something that this other random dude had said, just drove me off the wall. basically he got himself removed and blocked, because i couldnt stand his fucked up/bullshittin responses anymore..

"People have to die that's why they say there no cure every poison has an antidote boo
Everything has a cure but only the rich have access"

my family is richer than he is, and there still isnt a cure for me and my body and what i live with...

Me: umm no. rich people die too.
Dude: i know it would be strange if only poor or regular people die
Me: and who said that i wasnt rich tho? like if only rich people can find cures.. that's pretty fucked up if you think like that. cuz that's complete bullshit
Dude: That not what I'm saying
Me: no, thats what you did say, "Everything has a cure but only the rich have access" - that's a bullshit answer
Dude: Access  to what? I didn't say
Me: doesnt matter you have a sick way of thinking
Dude: So therefore that's not what I'm saying. It's just reality it's fucked up life is fucked up
Me: you are still fucked up and i dont care what you think. because no matter how much knowledge you have or lack of it, you still will not understand at all what i live with.
Dude: Oh that's what this is about, I didn't mean to offend you in anyway. I'm sorry, I could never know what you really go through. I would never try to add pain in your life. I'm sorry
Me: your sorry means shit. so no thank you

like seriously tho, all the celebs who have children that have so many health problems, or end up dying at birth or whatever the reason is... celebs have way more money than this dude has and they do not have a cure for their child's sickness. if there was a cure for cancer, people still wouldnt be donating money to find a cure for cancer.

Saturday, September 02, 2017

This Month's Music - Sept

well august went by quickly.. now it's SEPTEMBER!!!!

HOT 91.7FM - a bahamian radio station :D

TonAsh - his song I Yi keeps on being played on Hot 91.7

Khalid - i love his song Young Dumb & Broke

100 JAMZ - a bahamian radio station :D

Harry Styles - i love his song Signs of the Times

Alessia Cara - i love her song Scars To Your Beautiful

Melanie Martinez - i love her album Cry Baby

Captain Von Trap - i love his soundcloud

Jeré: i love his song The Race

Dru - i love his song On Purpose  

Soot Muzikk - gotta love uncle jimmy and his people 

Johnny Greg - sweet soundcloud

Friday, September 01, 2017

Everybody Blog Now

List of Blogs:
Life Of Jenya (the girl who got me blogging)
Welcome To My Thoughts (i gotta post my own)
The Crystal Auracle (not your typical blog: spells, crystals, etc)
Our Epic Story (a family living with a down syndrome boy)
#WHODAT ( a vblog featuring bahamians)
Shar Hanson (this gal is pretty auh mazing at what she does!)
Bahamas Entertainment (jay isaac's and shar's website - i ♥ these two)
Soot Muzikk Records (uncle jimmy from twitter :D)

Thursday, August 31, 2017

a crown

(these are messages i sent to my friend)

Aug 31st 2017
2:21am: Shit shit shit times a lot
2:25am: I was chewing and i bit something hard. Like it shouldn't be hard. I pulled everything out of my mouth.. first i thought it was plastic.  But i just lost a crown...
2:26am: This crown was done by a dentist i didn't like. The first one he did, it didn't last long and it actually popped off. Years later this one finally popped off. Why i prefer gold crowns

2:36am: i dunno what to do
2:39am: i basically need to see my dentist. but everyone is sleeping.
2:39am: i probably will have a shower incase i have an emergency appointment in the morning.
2:59am: going to pass on shower. im too cold for one. my plan was wake up have a shower get ready and see when my mom wants to go to the mall. but now with crown i dunno.
3:00am: like he's book up until october thats when i see him for my two cavities. so i gotta get a temp crown made get a gold one made and hopefully have it before im on vacation.
3:00am: im frustrated
4:38am: sleep time
10:43am: i have an appointment at 3:50pm today.
10:46am: but now i gotta go find my mom in the house cuz im up.
10:54am: im going to the mall soon so im going to shower. i cant stop yawning
10:55am: and my mom is glad this didnt happen while i was in bahamas

(after appointment)
5:12pm: um. i need gum surgery to remove some gum tissue so i have more tooth exposed. i have my old crown back on for the time being. so no bacteria gets in. so it was cleaned out the crown and put different glue in it. once im healed from gum surgery) whenever that appointment i) will tart looking into fitting a new crown (gold).

5:14pm: Ummm in this short amount of time from crown popping to the dentist, my tooth itself had fluid built up under the tooth so it was pushing my tooth up. So for like 10 mins i had to bite down hard on a cotton roll to push my tooth back into my jaw...

5:16pm: My tooth apparently is extremely sensitive. My dentist was cleaning it and the second time he hit a nerve and i went into fetal position and im think i screamed too. Im not sure. He said i could punch him for that but i said no. It wasn't his fault.

5:21pm: But yeah. My mouth is in more pain now than before my appointment. I was an ice cube at the dentist. My body shut down. Umm my crown itself was leaking and the glue that was used was eroding away. And there wasn't enough tooth for it to attached too. (I had this problem with my first crown done by this person.  And that popped off after a very short amount of time. Im not surprised this is happening. Im surprised it took this long for it to pop off tho.)

 Anyways, this is why i saw a new dentist cuz this dude who did these porcelain crowns wasn't a good one. Caused me a lot of pain too. So it's nice to have a memory and be a full circle and now soon all my crown work will be done by the same dentist. The one who knows what he is doing.

5:21pm: i need to nap. im very exhausted and my mouth hurts. ill chat with you when i wake up.

Thursday, August 24, 2017


this dude was asking me relationship advice and i was giving him some. and i was going on how bahamian women are jealous and think im a threat. and i was going on how im from canada, im like in a different time zone, im disabled. im totally not appealing. and what not
and this dude asked me how im disabled. and i responded with i live with a lot of health issues.. and the dude said you lying

like he raves about my blog saying im like the big blogger or the best blogger or whatever. so i sad something havent you read my blog?!

because well if you have read my blog you will know shit about my health

"i Hadnt Read In A Minute Because I Was Busy With My New Job I Havent Been Reading Much Blogs Lately Send Me The LInk Because FOr Some Reason Im Very Upset N Hurt Dnt Knw Why"

then i gave him the nutshell version of what i have with links, my allergies, and what not.
like the links are on my profile....

"Honeslty Once In A While I Always Go Thru Your Pics Pr On Your Profile To See How You Doing Ive Never Seen A Link On Your Profile I Just Looked Again"

"Could We Stop Talking About It Because Ive Never Seen It I Didnt Know And You My Good Friend And I had A Frend Once Who Was Sick And he Didnt Telme That Shit Hurt me Deep Yo You Got My Eyes Leakin N Shid in order for me to see you rabout i will have to click on it i never clicked on an about on any of my lists i think maybe now i should"

like it's on my profile, it's all over my blog, i also write about my health on my facebook account, i have an album called random feet pictures.... like im not hiding anything and this dude is like all mad at me for not telling him.. like it's not my fault this dude didnt check my profile out. like actually check it out

like i told him this information isnt new information ive been living with this shit for over a decade...

"Im Reading I Kno Its Not New To You But Understand Its New To Me Your Cool With It Im Jus ..idk But I Just Didnt Know WHat Was Going On But Im Reading"

omg i hate how he fucking types its annoying shit

like i have videos of me walking or me in a wheelchair or me in crutches.. like how do you not know this?! when its everywhere on my profile?!

him and i have been friends since march... like thats enough time to check my profile out...

like i hate when people tell me im lyin or ask how im disabled.

so this person im half chatting too is like saying all she needs to go through with doctors and what not and i wished her all the best. and she like questioned what i meant by that. and im like well im wishing you the best cuz you deserve the best and you deserve to be fixed.. and she is like well i have to see these doctors cuz im in pain. and im like you can see as many doctors as you want doesnt mean you are going to be healed or fixed.

like should have just left with thank you. instead of questioning me why im wishing you all the best

like seriously tho. like you can play the poor me card and it wont get you that far. like you are talking with someone who lives with many diseases and there is no cure for it. you are talking with someone who has messed up eyes because of what she lives with. surgery didnt help me im still have fucked up eyes. im still seeing all these doctors cuz they think they know what the hell they are doing but they dont. half the
them are trying to kill me.

my own eye doctor is wanting me to see other doctors because she believes its not my eyes that needs fixing its my body that needs fixing. no shit sherlock. what i live with you cant fix. so fix my damn eyes.

its like my main doctor for health, he cant help anymore, he wants me to see other doctors. like ive seen other doctors and most of them are trying to kill me. like that allergist who says go have a gluten free diet.. that thing caused me even more pain than i started with. like no.

like this one doctor my eye doctor wants me to see is this body talk. who like studies bodies and like im sorry i dont want to relive my past all over again just so i can fucking see out of my eye balls. like no thanks

More Cotton Candy Please!!!!

Wednesday August 23rd 2017 - HAIR DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hair: Halie
Salon: Alter Ego's Hair Company

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

A Comic Book

(i wrote this to my friend)

you know that if we like were a power couple and we live together and like are an item for life basically. so husband and wife. anyways, like if you did comic books, i probably would find my way into your comic books. and those who really read comics or look at everything in a comic book, will find hidden messages.

anyways, so these hidden messages would be about me or about you, or they would just be a signature of mine.

so youll have this huge fan base cuz they want more comics for from you. and one day im no longer in the picture for whatever the reason it is. and your fans start to realize that something is missing from your comic books. and they just dont know what exactly. so they would go through all your comic books look through everything take pictures of these hidden messages/my name.. and realize that is the piece that is missing.

they dont know how to reach you or contact you. since you like to be a private person. but somehow word of mouth gets them to buy comics books of yours. and people start creating social media accounts, wanting to know what happened to the comic books why the hidden messages/my name is gone, like what happened.

and you finally come across all this, because you dont use social media much. and you end up writing a new comic book. and its about this girl and the life story but in a comic book format.. and the last page, she dies.

and the fans dont know how to respond. they dont know how to reach you. they dont wanna over step. they dont know who this girl is but they know that you loved her very much. they start a facebook page, wanting you to create more comic books. and they know its hard for you to add her name to each one. so instead of you doing it, your fans create their own pictures of the girl's name (my name). so now, your comic books have your story line/pictures, and a lucky fan's picture of my name for each book. so your fans are now apart of your comic books. 

and you become even bigger after the love of your life dies, your comic books are still making you wealthy, and you have fans across the world supporting you what you love doing.

new eyes - 2

i really dislike talking about this subject. it's not the most happiest thing ever either. i still cant see perfectly. i still have problems. certain things makes my vision worse. example: being upside down, being on antihistamines, certain lights, wearing sunglasses, etc. it's annoying. it's even more annoying, when you go to eye doctors and they cant help you either. saying stuff like your vision is fine. or are you sure you have this.. like people, i know i cant see well. i know i have problems. im running in to walls again. im still extremely jumpy. my face is still hurting cuz im straining too much. like why cant i have 20/20 like i did for 3 days. i want that back.

Friday August 18 2017 (talkin to a friend):
Im in the office waiting for my appointment.
I did some tests. Now my eyes have dilation drops in and im waiting for the doctor now.
My left eye is flippin annoying.
Like the eye exam reading the screen. My left i saw letters and letters above the actual letters and it never got fixed.
My left eye didn't stop seeing the letters that weren't actually there.
Like you have 5 letters. I have letters above those letters. Those above letters shouldn't be there. That aint normal.
My eyes are dilated.
Im still waiting for the doctor                      
I had a trip... like ttttrrrrriiiippppppppppppyyyyyyy..                      
I see 3 of everything.                    
My eyes still dilated. Still waiting. Im pretty sure they are behind                      
I was extremely hyper and now im tired. My mom says that's what i do. I just wanna sleep to stop seeing blur. Like i give up and sleep.  And im like sounds about right                      
Finally saw the doctor                      
I don't know all the terms and what not. But i am getting worse. And i will be getting a prescription to go get a contacts to put over my implants                      
It's my left eye's fault                      
My extremely 3 people blurriness is gone, meaning im coming out of dilation                      
Im still dilated. Im home and everything was awful                    
Been a long long day                      
Im tired of sitting. Im extremely hungry. I brought fruit snacks with me to eat. I had iced tea for the drive. And yeah                      
I have an eye doctor appointment with my main eye doctor next week so i can try contacts. So there is a plan now                      
Once im stable which i may not ever be. I can get lasik done. If my left ever never stops getting worse and i go back to be really bad like how i was before surgery. I most likely will have surgery again to get a new implant lens                      
And i may need to keep on getting stronger contacts too. So yeah. My eyes are still fucked

Saturday August 19 2017 (facebook status):
my vision is getting worse.
im not getting better.
my left eye has problems.
im going to be getting contacts, to go over my implant lens.
if i can be stable, i can get lasik. if not, ill be getting another surgery in the future for a new implant lens.
all i want is my 20/20 back that i had for 3 days after surgery.

Tuesday August 22 2017 (talking to a friend):
My mom said that the eye surgeon guy wants me to come in every 3 weeks to check my eyes and watch my progress. So he now knows that office now knows  that my eyes are changing fast and not getting better.                        
I may need to have cornea surgery and that may fix all my eye sight problems.                        

So now I'm kinda back being a test subject again since im being monitor every month.

(after appointment)

No contacts for me.
Cant wear them. They don't fix anything.
My eye doctor wants me to see other doctors that are eye doctors.  And im like what i live with cant be fixed. So im stuck with bad vision.                        
Like she said at least you wake up being able to seem and im like no. I wake up being really blurry and it takes an hour for the extremely blurry to disappear.  
Like i was in a change room today, i got a jumper or romper thing. It was shorts and a tank top in one.
And the longer i was in the change room the worse my vision got.                       
The more i bend over more my vision goes. Like it's sad                        
And it's frustrating each appointment i go too i don't get help. It doesn't fix anything                        
And my eye doctor is like you've gone a long ways going from heavy strong prescription to eye surgery to not needing to wear glasses.  And im like i still not 100% i still have problems. 
And she is like even if you had 20/20 for months your eyes will catch up and give you focusing issues. And im like ill always have problems.                        
And back in tears i go                        
Im done talking about my eyes. Hate the topic maked me cry every day.                        
And i still regret getting surgery                        

And yes im crying

Tuesday Augst 22 2017 (facebook status):
contacts do not work. they dont even fix my problem.
another note, the eye surgeon dude, wants me to come in every 3 weeks, to check on my eyes. and see how much it changes and what not. so they are going to be monitoring me. and eventually i may be having cornea surgery (lasik) to help fix my problem. but i need to be stable in order to do that.
but yeah, welcome to my life of my weird messed up eyesight.

new eyes

My Dream... - 9

sunday aug 20th, 2017
I had a dream i peed my pants and i was on the computer. like it just wouldnt stop flowing. i went downstairs to get cleaning supplies, and i had to dodge my dad (i dunno why he wouldnt let me by), and i grabbed a 2L bottle of cherry cola to help remove the urine from the carpet... i didnt even make it upstairs, before i woke up. i had to check myself/bed to see if i actually peed, but i didnt. i went to the bathroom just in case. after that, i went back to sleep.

i had another dream. I dunno where I was but i ended up being in an extremely weird town and as a large group we went in this building. Each door lead to somewhere else. The last room i was in was in the men's closet room. And we were looking through everything looking for stuff. I don't know what. This lady came and turned the lights on and said everyone out now. (She was say the person we shouldn't get caught by). So a small group of us, took a new door that lead us to a hallway and we picked a random door. And now we are outside. In this very strange town. And it started walking down the street. We sang a song... and the weird town people did too. It was sooo weird i woke up.

Monday, August 14, 2017

My Dream... - 8

i had this dream august 14th, 2017

like i went to the zoo.. first my dad had to pick my sister up and he said could have just used the train. then my dad had to find my mom, which didnt take long i said she was outside in the back, but apparently she was in the front. then we went to the zoo. my sister was apparently drunk and it was her birthday, and she stamped her body with the get in zoo stamp... but apparently it was also her daughter's birthday too.. and she was wearing a tiara, and a sign saying she wanna ride the rides because today she is old enough...

so the zoo people got us all these booklets for tickets to do the rides and the games. we kinda highjacked the zoo office. apparently my oma was there and was using the phone, but we told her we had to go because the people who work there actually needed to use the phone.
we went to this weird building, i thought we were going to see animals but apparently we went into the craft room, and they were making sandwiches... with those melon ball tools... so tiny balls of sandwich... and then it was full of toddlers like babies in diapers. and my nephew was there apparently, and i asked if he pooped but he said you can check. and im like i dont check i just asked if you needed a diaper change and he said no. then i saw this kid with eyemake up on... and im like uh i dont know you.. but i think you pooped.
and then i woke up.

Wednesday, August 09, 2017

B & E

god doesnt physical heal everyone, why people die. but he heals them in other ways. i know that i wont be 100% heal. ive already accepted that and moved on. i dont let what i have eat me up or let it ruin my life. i still do things. i may not be able to do everything, but i still do things. i still have a good heart. i never was a bad soul. like i scream a lot when i kill a spider. im not the ones who will go burn down a house cuz  a spider was in it. i wouldnt even know how to light a match id be to scared. im getting off topic. like i want to give your mom flowers, because i know what its like to live with health crap. its a gesture that is thoughtful and sweet. im not there in person to send her a flower each day, or make her smile each day or laugh or whatever. but i still can think about sending her stuff. i send you pictures to send to your mom. like she is thought of every day in canada. i dunno if you know that or if she knows that, but i think about her and send good thoughts.

after my last relationship, i thought god didnt have anyone for me. like the guy i want didnt exist, it only happens in the movies. which is basically all fake cuz those are all scripted. i rather be single than be in an abusive relationships. and its sad to hear that, cuz all the ones ive been are abusive relationships. i dont know what a real relationship is. i dont know what love is. not the kind in relationships. the love i have for people, i dont get back when im dating someone. it doesnt happen.

and then you came along, i havent even met you yet, and im already in love with you. you tell me stories of your past relationships and how they treated you like this or how they didnt like anything you did. and all i could think of is i want that. i want what you have. i want what you give when you are in relationship. i want to experience that.  i just want to be with you. i believe you are made for me, that you are supposed to be in my life and we are supposed to be together. i never felt this much of a connection with anyone. not even the ones ive dated.  or the ones ive talked to for a few months or whatever. you make me forget a lot of things, like a lot of bad shit. you make me dream and hope for things. i cant stop thinking when im with you. i wanna something with you, at least once a day. i dont care what, just something that isnt laying around doing nothing, that isnt just sex based. i wanna enjoy life with you and i wanna explore the world with you.

Wednesday, August 02, 2017

This Month's Music - Aug

cant believe it's another month.

Scavella: dropped a new mixtape called Comfortable Balance.
Shaton: just love this dude.
The Chill: has new music podcasts out.
Ferb: has an ep called Ache that i cant stop listening too. my favorite song is called Tomorrow.
Duckie MrPoetry: dropped an ep called Rhythm & Poetry.
Vivi TheOnly: he needs some lovin (support) 
Johnny Greg: i know him from Runaway, Shaton did the vocals and Johnny did the beat. his beats are pretty sick.
Blitz King: has dropped a new song called Goodbye Old Me (he recently just had a birthday - Aug 10th).
Savage 100: has a mixtape called Why So Savage?
Foreign Sound: i just love their sound. hopefully they will post new songs :D
A. Major: just dropped a mixtape called The Weekend
Clayton Dell: just dropped a single called New Skies
Annie OST (2014): soundtrack is stuck in my head

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

This Month's Music - Ju

it's a new month, time for a new blog post about what music i am listening. you may have heard of these names before or they may be new people. either way, support and follow them if you love their music. <3

Blitz King: has dropped a couple songs "Level Up" and "What's Left 2 Give".

Reggie Micz: has dropped a song called "Only 1"

NewAge Music Group: has dropped an ep on facebook called "AL"

Exile Media Group

Cahj Monet:
has dropped a song called "Steps"

Wednesday, July 12, 2017


TonAsh has lyric videos :D :D :D yes im a tad bit excited. i love his music so much, and these videos are so much fun to watch.

there is one called Live Where You Vacay, and it has a fat PIG in it. it's adorable, it steals the show. plus the song it's self is pretty awesome too, it makes me wanna go back to the bahamas like yesterday:

there is one called Bahama Mama which is one of my favorite songs from him. i get called a "Bahama Mama" a lot, for a reason i still dont understand. but it always makes me think of this song:

Support TonAsh:

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

i hate technology

so ive had my phone (samsung galaxy note II) for 4 years... and every 6 to 12 months i factory reset it.. cuz something in the phone isnt working properly. and i dont like buying new shit when the first shit isnt completely broken.

the reason why i have this phone, is because the previous phone (lg optimus chat), after a year of owning it, it was force shutting itself off, and you couldnt turn it back on... so i went to the store, and someone else was there because her phone (same one) wouldnt turn back on either. so i knew it was the phone, not me. so i got a new phone.

i update my phone when there is a new update, some updates screwed my phone up so id factory reset it and it would fix the problem. last year, my charger wouldnt charge my phone. it always died. the charge didnt last long either. plus it made noises when i was charging it. i did the factory reset, i lost a shit load of pictures and videos that i couldnt get back. and i wasnt allowed to upload them on anything, cuz of paranoia. so those memories are basically gone. i use pictures/videos to help with my memory. anyways, factory reset fixed the problem for a bit, but than it went back to crappy battery. i invested in a new phone charger. it is 40% faster at charging compare to other chargers. and it worked. damn good. even my brother uses it for his phone when he comes over. cuz it actually charges your phone. but now im in the same boat as i was last year. my charger isnt charging my phone while its beind used. its taking forever to charge. last night, my phone was dying and no matter what i did, it wouldnt charge. i didnt use it, i turned it off, i reset it, i removed the battery and put it back in, i changed outlets, nothing made this fucking phone charged.

so guess what i did? i factory reset my phone, cuz it used to help in the past. i lost some videos, i added pictures to a photo album on facebook set to private. i thought i was backing up my phone, but guess id didnt. i click the backup and reset that didnt do anything. my whatsapp messages didnt get saved i thought it was on an auto back up, or i thought they were being backed up. so all the messages that ive starred (saved) from my one friend well all those are gone. after i factory reset my phone, i basically wanted to die. i hated it so much. i hated losing everything that i had. i hated reprogramming my phone. i hated thinking i backed it up but nothing was saved.  i hated being lied too. its like i broke up with my phone. and it made me super depressed and it sucked. the people who i have on whatsapp, one he was sleeping, the other was kinda busy. if he was here, he would have backed up my phone properly. i didnt know. i dont back up shit properly.

so, last night while my phone wasnt really charging, but than it started to charge, but it died while i was using it. i added the stuff back. the only thing i need to do is get my pictures back from facebook. but i may wait on that. i finally went to sleep, it was about 5 hours. the last message i sent to my friend i had my phone charging at 47% i woke up and it was only at like 80something% as i was using my phone, to check my messages on whatsapp, my phone started to die. and im like, this is fucking annoying. even after going through the factory reset it didnt fix anything. and i lost so much stuff too. so it was a waste. but really, if my phone had died and wouldnt turn back on, i would have lost everything anyways, and i wouldnt have saved any of my pictures.

but now, im going to look for a new phone. or convince my parents to get me a new phone. and hopefully, i can have the same number, and the same phone plan that ive had for so many years. which is why i hate getting new phones cuz not everyone wants to give me the same phone plan, cuz it's better than their phone plan. i got lucky one year, it was a back to school deal.

and during all of this, i have a massive horrible head cold, so my head was in so much pain dealing with all this shit. and im still not even happy.

i was able to go to the store with my mom, first we went to the phone carrier's store. the guy there took my battery out and started to spin it. he kept on playing with it. he told me "batteries shouldnt spin" and mine was spinning alright. he check in the back, but the store doesnt carry a replacement one. the store itself doesnt carry any note phone either. so we went to the store he suggested. that store, didnt have the battery that i needed, he suggested to go to another store. that store had the battery i needed, and decided to be a smart ass... as in, i asked something that this battery isnt from the black market or anything, and he said its from so and so with heaps of cocaine in it. that didnt help my stress level at all. this company has my old battery, and we bought the new one. as in my mom bought the new one. so far, its hold it's charge, it didnt die so fast from going to different stores or going home. i still had charge. my phone isnt charging while im using it.. so maybe i need a new cable or something i dunno. im going to play around with that. but i just know, my new battery has improvement.

im not pissed off anymore, i was able to download my pictures from facebook, so i edit my wallpaper on my phone and some apps too. still miss my messages from a couple of friends, but now i know how to back that up properly. incase i need to, when i get a new phone. i most likely will not factory reset my phone again. that is way to much stress and anxiety and all the bad stuff that comes with that feeling of starting over. but yeah. it's good to have a fresh phone with a new battery pack. so the factory reset wasnt a total waste.

edit edit (next day):
i need a new charger. fml

edit edit edit:
i got a samsung charger and it works even faster than the charger i had before. so now, im only buying samsung chargers. it's more pricey, but it's better for my phone.

Monday, June 26, 2017

Help 1 Other - 2

remember back in the fall, where i was writing about Help1Other and i was going to meet up with a family friend, to receive dog tags and take pictures. well in november that didnt happen, due to an emergency braces removal. so, finally that day has arrived, on june 26th 2017!

it happened in the morning, the lovely family friend, Jacqueline, came over to see me and my mom. she handed me an envelope (that had a card/dog tag inside), she also gave me another one to give to a friend. i handed her my ziplock of change for her. she didnt want it, but i said "it's a donation. ive been waiting for months and months to give it to you, and now i can."

we went outside in the backyard, the last time she was here, nothing was really done with the yard, and now well it's a vacation spot. (a pool, fire pit, hot tub, lots of trees/flowers. nice backyard). anyways, after we showed her around, it was picture time. i took some selfies wearing my dog tag, i had pictures with her beside me (those are on her phone, will post later when i have access to them), and i did some of my own as well.

here are the pictures:
i went to the saskatoon farm and took a selfie showing off my new bling:

more information:

Saturday, June 24, 2017


i am really good friends with Creed Films (or should i say Creed Films Media, they got a name change). i even started my own hashtag on twitter for them called #CREEDFilms / #CREEDfilms / #CREEDFILMS. (youll find blog posts i have of them, their music videos, and other youtube videos as well.) i hope you fall in love with them as much as i have. they produce pretty awesome videos.

for this blog post, im going to do something different, im going to post each of the artists music videos that creed films have produced/created. as well as, links to go follow/support them. they really need our international support. i shouldnt be the only one who loves these famous people.

Highway Driving by Shaton

Sands by Shaton

Support Shaton:

Receipts by Glitch Rye ft Cahj Monet

Sensory Overload by Glitch Rye

Support Glitch Rye:

Lotto Hit A Lick by Cahj Monet ft Triple O

One Day by Cahj Monet

Support Cahj Monet:

Smoke & Mirrors x Wave Gawd by Shabazz

Support Shabazz:

Saturday, June 17, 2017

new eyes

so if you are new to my blog and wondering why i have new eyes... well on june 8th 2017, i got double eyeball surgery and i got lens implants. im not able to go on the computer much, so im not blogging like i used too. i post updates on facebook and later one when im able to use the computer i copy those statuses and i post them in blog posts. so this is what has been happening lately:

june 15th:
So you are probably why im not active and well i have problems with my vision. It was going on me the other day. I thought it was maybe lack of sleep or needing to use more eye drops. Today i woke up and i was blurry. as the day went on, i was more blurry. Like different sections of my house are blurred out. Half my tv screen is blurred out too, depending on the picture. Like i have troubles reading too cuz it's not clear. Id look at someone and i see them and an extra head and arm. It's called ghosting i think. Like it's uncomfortable. Eyedrops make it worse. Im squinting a lot too. I figured out it's my left eye. Closing left, right is clear. Closing right, left is blurry/fogged.
Umm my dad is like pissed off that my vision is going on me. My mom just feels sorry for me that yet again i cant have something that goes well. My mom called her sister who told her to call them now. (Mom was going to call tomorrow cuz it's already evening). My mom called and talked with a lady. Long story short, ill be going back tomorrow morning (friday). Ill be seeing ppl to check my vision and if needes to the doctor will see me too. And i may need to have surgery again to tweak my lens implant.
So yeah. Vision isnt fun anymore.

friday june 16th:
So my prescription has changed. My bad eye (right) is 20/20. My good/dominant eye (left) was 20/20 but now it's 20/15. My eye has like a hairline difference like it's -0.5 a new lens wont help it may make things worse, plus doctor doesn't recommend it. Lasik wont work cuz the laser doesn't even go down that small. Like it's a smidge off 20/20 
But because it's in my dominant eye my brain remembers it seeing 20/20 before so that's why to me in my body it's a big difference big change and it effects how i see
If i had this in my bad eye, i may not even notice my vision is going on me.

I go back next Friday to check again. I may need glasses. But again it will be better than what i had before. It may fix itself on it own or it may get worse.

So next Friday we will see.

friday june 23:
so my right eye still sees 20/20 and my left eye still sees 20/15. the -0.5 is still driving me bananas, like everything is still blurry galore. i dont like it. tv is still annoying to watch. anyways, so my left eye hasnt changed so that's a good thing. i have to wait 6 weeks more weeks until i come back to get a prescription for glasses, 1 contact, and/or a badass lookin monocle (suggested by my friend). i still have to wait another week, before i can go swimming (so basically what i said from the start, july ill be swimming). this also means i still cant shower yet. im not allowed to get water in my eyes... and me and showers dont mix well. so ive been going to my hair salon on wednesdays to get my hair washed/style. so yeah.

still recovering. left eye is still blurry. right eye is blurry when i have a headache/migraine, or the weather is just bad. went to the check up appointment, my vision is fine they say. (even tho it's not fine). now i have to get more tests done, to see why the eff i was 20/20 and now im not. like i rather not be able to read my tv screen (wearing glasses), than having a hard time just watching tv (after surgery). it's frustrating. why i havent been blogging much, or writing updates on my eyes. they annoy the hell out of me. it's a depressing topic for me.